Strange New GTA: Vanilla Ice, Kim Basinger, and Danny Glover. When 505 Games announced its colourful multiplayer heist game Crime Boss: Rockay City at last night’s The Game Awards, I thought I was suffering a stroke. Time was winding down.
It was clear from the trailer that this was not a new instalment in Rockstar Games’ open-world smash hit Grand Theft Auto, but the similarities were striking. It’s actually a PC game I haven’t heard of before, developed by a company I’ve never heard of, and featuring an entirely unrelated group of Hollywood actors and actresses who were cast just for this project.
Michael Madsen, known for his roles in Reservoir Dogs and Donnie Brasco, plays Travis Baker, a want to be Florida kingpin who engages in “a series of turf fights, robberies, and strange side stories” in Crime Boss.
Crime Boss is an online PvE shooter extravaganza where you team up with random people from the internet to pull off heists in the spirit of Payday 2. The trailer makes it seem like a cinematic story game, but this is not the case. Even with all the famous faces from the ’90s, the gameplay seems unremarkable. This is not a new L.A. Noire.
(GameSpot) 6 Minutes of Crime Boss: Rockay City Official Gameplay
Take on the role of Travis Baker – a man with his sights set on becoming the new King of Rockay City, one crime at a time.https://t.co/2lTJ0h8KRG pic.twitter.com/3PnuyDbxMc
— Idle Sloth💙💛 (@IdleSloth84_) December 9, 2022
What kind of success can yet another generic live-service game expect from the glamour of ageing Hollywood stars? Look at the preview and make up your own mind: It’s common knowledge that actors like Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon) and Michael Rooker (Guardians of the Galaxy) are awesome, that Kim Basinger (Batman) is a cultural icon, that Danny Trejo (Machete) will appear in anything for money, and that Vanilla Ice (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze) is…sure, fine, whatever.
CRIME BOSS: ROCKAY CITY | ANNOUNCE TRAILER | DO IT FOR THE CREW
A first-person shooter heist game, playable solo or with friends from the team at InGame Studios and 505 Games.
Coming to Xbox Series X|S, PS5 and Steam on March 28th, 2023https://t.co/XIPuRYdc5z pic.twitter.com/5SlL7OBxGZ
— Idle Sloth💙💛 (@IdleSloth84_) December 9, 2022
Then there’s Chuck Norris, who Game Awards host Geoff Keighely proudly pointed out during the Livestream and who features extensively in Crime Boss’ marketing, but whom, frankly, I do not need to ever lay eyes on again.
Here’s the debut trailer for Crime Boss: Rockay City, out 3/28/2023! @EpicGames #TheGameAwards pic.twitter.com/MXeb1Wr4Xq
— The Game Awards (@thegameawards) December 9, 2022
The real-life karate expert who was fictionalised After 9/11, the Texas Ranger meme went viral, but if you’ve been keeping up with the news, you know he’s a bigoted homophobe and a right-wing nut job. You shouldn’t give in to his demands, and he shouldn’t be featured in your mediocre neon noir robbery simulation.
Laced is proud to have worked on the reveal trailer for @CrimeBossGame: Rockay City, syncing Stereo MC's '90s anthem "Connected".https://t.co/w5yW9PXGml
(Chuck Norris!! 🥾💥)
— Laced (@Laced_audio) December 9, 2022
Who knows how involved he or anyone else will be with Crime Boss? We can only speculate. Since it isn’t listed on the Ingame Studios website, we can assume that this is the studio’s first effort in the video game industry.
505 Games is publishing it “in cooperation with Epic Games,” whatever that means, and if you pre-order it in the next two days, you can save 40 per cent. Launching on PC only through the Epic Games Store on March 28, 2023, with console releases to follow later in the year. I can’t say whether or not it will be any good, but it definitely has the craziest global premiere of 2022.
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